Session 19: Power of Positive Thinking

Following one of the worst sessions ever (see Session 18), I decided to "double-up" on class today and took two sessions in a row. It wasn't exactly planned, but the idea has in the back of my mind all week.

With a short 2-day trip to D.C. this weekend, I knew it would be difficult to meet my 30 days without falling behind on this commitment. And while this yoga thing is great, I'm not exactly enthusiastic about sacrificing time from my short vacation - which will be spent seeing friends, exhibits, and monuments in Washington DC - for the sake of meeting my '30-days in a row' goal.

So when my first practice today was filled with a multitude of distractions caused by neighboring yogis, I told myself I would at least consider taking a second class.

Normally this is a complete impossibility, totally unfathomable, and completely unreasonable to consider. People just don't do that! Not regular people, anyway. And I am still very much a regular person. I have yet to consider a handstand is a realistic possibility. Balance on my hands with my feet just in the air.. with no one holding my feet?! No. I don't do that.

In fact, I actively hold myself back. I tell myself I must first master the basics before I can go into anything that advanced. I don't even give myself the option of considering it. I mean, sure, I'll play around with the idea when the option is there, but it's always - "later" or "today is not that day."

But today was about reconciliation. That first practice wasn't a "real" class because it was filled with bad juju and negative energy. And, besides, the second class is shorter.

So I gave it a try. I moved my mat to a different part of the room (a cooler part!), got myself a coconut water (electrolyte replacement is key here), and gave it a shot. I figured that even if I only did some of the moves, I could probably get through it, even if I couldn't walk all weekend.

Molly & I with others in Namawanga, Kenya in 2007

My friend Molly happened to come to this class. As soon as I saw her it instantly elevated my mood. We chatted for a bit and I admitted how "crazy" I was for doing two classes in a row. When class started I began slowly, easing into each position. I made assumptions about how hard it would be. I warned myself that this could be a really bad idea. And I moved, each time, with no expectations. I was exploring, trying something new, and completely forgiving the limitations of my already sore muscles.

To my surprise, the class was actually not that hard. In fact, I really enjoyed it. I was able to bend deeper, to push myself farther, to really get into each pose far more than normal. Each time we moved into something that was challenging, I surprised myself with the ease in which I took it. And, by the end of class, I had reached total, complete bliss.

Photo from MLK Jr. Monument in Washington D.C.

So there you go. I guess it is possible to do nearly 3 hours of straight hot yoga and live to tell about it. And, even better, I have a renewed sense of possibility. Women in the career coaching business will tell you that women often discount themselves when they should be empowered. We assume we can't make a big career move, can't try out for the promotion, can't go on that vacation, can't have fun while we're under deadline pressure. But the truth is, that the only person that is telling us that we can't is ourselves.

And this is a good lesson to start thinking about what we can do. Explore possibilities. Try out something new. See what happens. It may not work out in your favor. Or it may be the best decision you ever made. You won't know it until you try. And, that, my friends is what really counts in the end.

For more inspiration, read Tara Sophia Mohr's 10 Rules for Brilliant Women.

Session 18: Your Surrounding Environment

It's no secret that your surrounding environment affects you. This is pretty obvious in an office work setting. An uncomfortable chair, bad lighting, or an irritating neighbor can dramatically affect your mood, your productivity, and your general happiness.

Maybe the arms in your chair are too high and they always bump your desk when you turn around. Maybe a fluorescent light has just reached the end of its useful life and incessantly flickers all day. Or maybe your neighbor spends an entire morning talking loudly on the phone with a client.

All of these things are minor on their own, but when you are stressed about an impending deadline, or your still steaming from the argument you had with a friend/spouse the night prior, these small things can push you over the edge and lead to you saying or doing things you wouldn't normally do.

When I get irritated at work for a stupid reason, like my boss saying something sarcastic that I decided to interpret as a personal assault against my character (rather than a joke), I can usually trace it back to that guy that ran a red light during my commute and nearly hit me or maybe a deadline got pushed up that I wasn't anticipating, leaving me to worry about how I would fit this change into my schedule for the week.

Usually I spend those days blasting my iPod, stewing on the negative for a while, and giving off the "don't you DARE talk to me" vibe. When that doesn't work, I usually share a portion of my irritation with others: "can you BELIEVE she has been on the phone all day?!" or "what the hell was THAT supposed to mean?!". And, in the very rare case (it's happened twice in the last three years) where my irritation has completely derailed any hope of productivity for the day, I own my anger/irritation, and do everyone a favor by leaving for the day.

One of the things I realized during practice today was that leaving the scene of a bad mood can be great for your neighbors (let's face it, no one wants to be around an angry person) and your productivity (last time I left for this reason I ended up working 10 hours straight from home .. which not only addressed the thing that was stressing me out, it also allowed me to make amends with the opposition), but it's bad for your emotional health.

Leaving is an act of disengagement. Running away from something that is difficult, while alleviating the environmental stress of the scene, denies you of the opportunity to learn HOW to deal with it.

Let me preface my yoga experience with acknowledging that I had a particularly nice day at work today. Everything went smoothly, people were responsive and helpful, and my cube neighbors broke up the day with occasional conversation. In fact, it was such a productive day that I was able to go to the earlier class - something that I wanted, but believed to be a lofty goal, given my workload.  So when I arrived at class today I had no expectations. I was just there to enjoy myself, get into the practice, and maybe learn something new.

Class started off fine, but from the beginning I was a little awkward and it was difficult to find the correct alignment in standing poses. As the room started to heat up, I found myself getting frustrated by the awkwardness of my body in poses I had done hundreds of times. When I moved from one position to another, I had to spend extra time moving and twisting. Every pose was so challenging that I felt like I had no idea what I was doing. I started making verbal excuses in my mind: I was just having a bad day, it's hard to do this every day, I spent too much time in basics classes this week.

I started getting frustrated. Frustrated and angry.

As the anger built, I moved to child's pose and tried to trace back WHY I was so angry. What could have possibly set me off? I had a good day at work. I got everything done that I needed to. I was going on vacation first thing tomorrow morning. I was physically strong. And I had all of these motions a hundred times before.

I looked around me.

My neighbor to the left had her feet up on the wall, completely disengaged from the class. Before class started, she had an incident with someone else when she moved her mat from another position to the spot next to mine because to have a buffer. When the person said they would be willing to move and apologized, she refused and kept saying "it's not you, it's me." I had seen her a lot before and, for whatever reason, just didn't like her. She had an aggressive look, like if I moved the wrong way she would attack me. In previous interactions I had intentionally smiled and observed when she had pleasant conversations with other people. But today, with that strange interaction before class and her complete disengagement in the class made me feel surprisingly uncomfortable. Why bother going to class if you're not going to participate?

To my right was a girl I hadn't seen before. She was a little overweight and it was clear this was one of her first classes. She had a pleasant smile and generally seemed fine. But class wiped her out and she spent most of the time in child's pose.

Behind me was a pair of friends, one of which was crowding me for no reason. They occasionally talked to each other during class. I mean.. seriously?

In front of me was a girl who, if such a thing existed, appeared to be practicing for the yoga olympics (yogalympics). I do admire the work that it takes to get into handstands, but something about her energy made me feel like I was in a competition (this happens every once in a while.. I can't place how, but you can tell when someone is being competitive) and/or at some kind of variety show. Unfortunately for her, I have seen Cirque du Soleil and was not impressed.

But I had brought my own negative energy to class as well, though I didn't know it until this moment. Earlier today someone had sent me an email about a volunteer program they wanted to start up. They were adamant about talking as soon as possible and I found myself giving too much time to them when I had other more important things to do for the same organization. I react emotionally when people seem like they are trying to waste my time, particularly when it's in regards to a volunteer activity, and even more so when their motivation is all about self-promotion.

So there it was. I was in a nexus of bad juju and I would be stuck there for the remainder of class. I would address my irritation by staying through this class, in child's pose with everyone else (no yogalympics for me), stewing in my own frustration and anger.

And while I cannot reasonably blame my environment for the foulness of my mood and a soured practice, I have at least begun to acknowledge that the quality of my internal practice is a reflection of how I perceive my external environment. It's possible to be stubborn enough to stick through discomfort because all feelings eventually pass. {And they pass a lot faster when you're rescued from yourself by a friend, good conversation, and a glass of wine!}

Session 4: Food = Fuel and Why Salt is OK

Session 4 kicked my butt. Ironically, it was a short basics class which focused mostly on positioning your body correctly in each movement and a lot less posture-intensive from the all levels version. Yet, still, I found myself in child's pose while our instructor narrated breathing through the discomfort in our first position. I "cheated" with knees whenever possible just to give my shoulders a rest. I "took a break" to get hydrated not because I was thirsty, but because I just couldn't hack it. And I celebrated, quietly and to myself, when we reached the end of class.

And since I had reached this point already (didn't I say just yesterday how I couldn't wait for the next class?? That's what I get..), it seemed like the perfect opportunity to ask the instructor for some tips on surviving and thriving (yoga word) in the next month. Here is her advice:

• First, congratulate yourself for making a commitment to furthering your practice and to your physical and (sometimes) spiritual well being. Yoga is a holistic practice which can inspire and change your life {and it has - I'll post more on life changing experiences of others later}.
• Second, don't try to do every move. Instead, only participate in postures that nourish and further your practice {I laughed when she said this - that's easy! I couldn't do them all if I wanted to!}
• Also, make sure to hydrate consistently {more about hydration later}
• When you drink, you want to replace electrolytes lost during the practice. {Full article on hot yoga and electrolytes here through Livestrong.com}
• Make sure to eat salt (especially if you're craving it) {and I was!}
• And if the heat is wearing you down, do a session at home (out of the heat) just to give your body a break or take a day off. This is a marathon, not a sprint.

Her advice was, if nothing else, spot on and I appreciated every bit of it. {You don't have to tell me twice to add more salt to my diet!} But there was one piece of advice which I totally threw out the window and I would highly recommend others considering an intense physical commitment like this one to do the same: add more heat!

After a class where my body was absolutely exhausted, sore, and all muddled up with lactic acid, I knew that the best thing for me was to get to a hot tub and work it out.. and that's just what I did. After an hour between the hot tub, the shower, and the steam room at my fru-fru gym (healthworks is one of the top rated women's gyms in the country) I felt like I had switched bodies. It was amazing.

To take this as a lesson, regardless of who you are getting advice from - whether it be a highly practiced yoga instructor or your boss - just keep in mind that sometimes you do know what's best for you. And I don't mean use that as an excuse to avoid doing something you don't want to do - I mean do exactly what is the best thing for your body, mind, or soul regardless of what others think your limitations are.

Session 2: How to Lose a Liter of Water in 75 Minutes

Want to know how to lose a liter of water in 75 minutes? I'll give you a hint. It involves Day 2 of hot yoga, a hangover, and a liter of water. Mix the three together and you get pools of sweat on your yoga mat significant enough to twist an ankle.

By 60 minutes into class today I was sneaking glances at the empty 24oz. water bottle, which was sitting there teasing me from the top corner of my mat, and just hoping that the next move wouldn't send me running for the faucets. It wasn't just that I was committed to maintaining my concentration, I was also pretty sure that I would vomit if I moved suddenly. So, trapped on my mat, I grinned and bared it- knowing that every motion, every breath, brought me that much closer to shavasana.

The remedy? A towel, any towel will do, and preferably a full liter of water. Lesson learned. (Article on 10 things to know about Bikram yoga)

Earlier today I woke up with a refreshing sense of determination to approach Hot Yoga - Day 2. The birds were singing, it was sunny outside, and I knew I could take a nap when I got home. I forgave myself for arriving home after 4am thanks to a long night in Providence. The night was a total blast, but ended when I gave my oldest friend Katie (we've been friends since we were 5) a concussion thanks to a failed spin move while shuffling to 50s music in a dive bar. The result? Her head was bleeding and I kinked my right ankle and wrist in a way that left us both in pain, doing the yoga warrior series at 3am while eating pizza, and keeping her awake long enough to know she wasn't going to slip into a coma. Man, my life is not normally this exciting, but I wonder how it bodes for the rest of the year!

Today this was by far my best pose.
Photo Courtesy of Benefits-Of-Hot-Yoga.org

The class itself was just as challenging as the day before, but with the aches of yoga past coupled with the mild wrist injury and intensive sun salutations pushed me to spend a lot of time catching my breath in child's pose. Actually, I was quite literally chasing breath.. which was strange since aerobic exercise is not something you typically associate with calming, meditative yoga, so I'll give you a little more on that.

One of the unique focuses of this particular practice (which initially turned me off of the studio) is that it is very physically demanding. It's kind of like taking a regular yoga class, placing it in the deep rainforest, and demanding sprints in between poses while balancing on a mountain face. If you're not consciously aware of what is going on, it's actually pretty easy to overextend and wind up in a protective ball (i.e. child's pose), grasping the ground, and crawling to your water bottle just for relief. It's certainly not something for everyone, but knowing what you're in for is a good place to start.

Child's Pose. Photo courtesy of YogaXTC.com

With all of that said, I was still surprised to find myself searching for breath in child's pose while the other "all levels yogis" in my class jumped between downward dog and mountain pose with excited jubilation. They weren't just saluting the sun, they were saluting the entire year while I lay in a ball on my mat try to stay alive. Shortly after the sun salutations, the instructor recommended we do an arm balance. I emerged from my ball and looked at my mat.. and that's about as far as it got.

So my lesson for today is all about the resources you need to get through class. It's one thing to show up, mat in hand, and be content with yourself.. it's another to be prepared for the task at hand. You're far less likely to reach your potential if you don't have the tools you need to get there, and having a hand towel and full liter of water is a good place to start.